Making journals, coffee staining and scribbling.

Hey hey hey,

It's been about a month since my last post, so first I'd like to apologise for being such a wank sock. I honestly have no excuse other than I couldn't be fucked.

Moving on, I decided to post some pictures of the shit i've been doing since I last blogged. I really got into bookmaking (as I mentioned in my April Favorites post), and so I made myself a crappy journal out of printer paper and cardboard. It looked kinda shit to be honest, but it was my first try and now I have formed some sort of emotional attachement to this terribly made book, so I decided to use it as a journal. I've been pinning loads of inspiring journals, and I decided to make mine a sort of art - bullet journal. Art journals are just beautiful, and bullet journals are really practical, so I'm mixing both. Most bullet journals are very prissy, like all neatly lined and color coded and bla bla, which is kinda boring and ugly in my opinion. So I made this thing.

It originally was just brown paper that i'd drawn a mandala on, but I didn't like it so I stuck on some watercolour thing I did and made a little flag. It says bullet journal on the flag, but black on burgundy apparently isn't very vibrant. Who knew.

I made this journal using SeaLemons Text Block Tutorial on Youtube. I love her easy tutorials because she really shows you how to hide all the icky bits and make it look slick as fuck.

Here is the first page, my May 2016 Calendar. I made a grid on Open Office and then just printed it out and stuck it in, it was way easier than trying to do math. Then I wrote the days of the week on stubs of cute paper and glued them in.

Yes, that does say period. I like to have a rough idea of when i'm going to start pissing blood, so I don't wear nice underwear, you feel me.

The style I wanted for the journal sort of changed mid way, I started with vibrant colours and felt pens, but I didn't really like it, I prefer more neutral colours.

The second page I'm going to show you has two To-Do lists. I just like mixing and matching how I do the titles for each day and how I split up the pages.  I started kind of changing to more neutral colours and less felt tips.
My planner routine basically lets me know what I have to write in at night, in the morning, and in the day as I do shit.

These are my may diary pages. I did one for April too but it was super fugly so I decided not to post it. I just like to pick up bits and bobs when I go about my day that I may be able to glue into my diary page. Its basically a sort of summary of what my goals where, what goals I achieved and what cool stuff I did. I forgot to keep my ticket stub from the cinema so I had to scribble one.

This is an old recipe I glued in, I illustrated this a few months ago in a random notepad just for shits and giggles, but I thought it was totally cute and I didn't just want to throw it out. It's not vegan though so I can't use it anymore, unless I replaced the egg with a flax egg, but I've never tried to use flax eggs so I don't know what to expect.

And this is my fairly empty June Calendar. I don't have a lot going on this month, I'm just kinda waiting around until I go back home and start working this summer.

Here is another little notepad I made, just to scribble down passwords, numbers, other crap that I don't want to scribble in my bullet journal.

And I just thought I'd add this is because it's cute; another mandala, unfinished but I thought it was pretty cute. They're really fun just to doodle when you're stressed or bored or whatever.

Well I hope it won't be another month before I post again, but you know, I'm really lazy.
I'd love to have any advice you have about keeping a bullet journal, too.

See y'all soon !


April Favorites

I know i'm late again, but I decided to do another monthly favorites post, because they're super fun.
As I said last time I've been feeling a bit ill recently, so sorry for the slow posting !
Welp, I guess we should just dive right in.

1. Bookbinding

Check out my Bookbinding Pinterest board here.

I've been getting really into making my own books; I made one for myself because it was kinda shit so I couldn't really give it away, and now I'm in the process of making one for my boyfriends mum and/or dad. I'm going to make them both a book. I got really inspired by some pins you can find here in my bookbinding pinterest board. I also love Sealemons youtube tutorials, she does loads of crap like bookbinding, casing, text blocks and some other stuff. I do wish she used the metric system though, cause 1/8th of an inch means fuck all to me. 

2. Handmade Ceramics

I get a big homeware boner when it comes to beautiful ceramics. I love handmade homeware, things like these are so unique and eye catching. I don't know if i'd actually use them for food though to be honest.

3. Bob's Burgers

Oh my god though, I have marathoned like the whole series in probably about 2 months. I'm so addicted and I'm nearly up to date, I don't know what I'll watch when I'm done, any ideas ? I can't really watch horror/stressful things at the moment so cartoons are good. 

I picked up four of these in my local bookstore each for under 2 euros, and they're so cute ! They contain one or a few short stories by notable authors. I picked up 2 Edgar Allen Poe books, a Brothers Grimm one and a H.G Wells story. They're just adorable.

5. ROMWE crop top

I love love love love crop tops so hard, and I love aliens, and I need this top so bad it's killing me that I'm so poor. It's so inexpensive too ! God bless you Romwe. It comes in a few colors, my faves are the white and baby pink.

6. Chamomile Tea

I usually drink coffee and black tea, but my doctor told me to cut out caffeine recently, so I've been drinking buckets of chamomile tea. I already drank it sometimes, but now it's pretty much my go-to hot beverage (besides Rooibos tea). If you have anxiety problems, definitely substitute black tea / coffee for herbal tea. It tastes bomb too, so that's cool.

Well I hope this was a fun time for you, I certainly had fun.
I'll be back at you soon with some new exciting and creatively worded bullshit, as usual.



Thrift // Mum's Closet Haul.

Yeah I know, it's been a bit of a long time since I last posted. Truth is I was at my parents and not only was I having a great time not worrying about anything, but I also felt pretty ill.

I'm catching up today with a thrift haul, plus a few bits I pulled out of the bottom of my mums closet. These are things she bought to sell on Etsy years ago, and when she closed her shop they just sat there, so I took 'em. 

So lets get started; 

Black floral child's skirt & Basic black button t-shirt.

This skirt says age 10 on it, and when I picked it up I was like "....... can I do it ?" and the answer is YES I FUCKING CAN. I squeezed my sausage body into this adorable piece of shit and I can rock it hard. I love the button details and the swoosh. 
The t-shirt is just a basic black button down top, but it fits really well and most importnantly it's suuuuper soft. Like baby buttcheek soft. 

High Waisted Light Wash Jeans

I just thought these were really cute. I actually thought they'd be baggier and more of a boyfriend cut but this looks nice too. They fit nice on the butt, I often have problems with high waisted jeans making my butt sag, but these do the job pretty nicely. And they look great with my little black h&m shoes. 

"Barbie" Grey Muscle Tee

When I saw this I was like elbowing everyone out of the way to get to it. I don't know I just love it so much, I think it looks so great with a flannel and some jeans. 

Green Mens Flannel

Well, I love flannels, all colours, sizes, everything. I just particularly liked the colours here, the green with a tiny bit of red is really cute. 

Multicolored Striped Cropped Shirt

This was at the bottom of my Mums closet, I love the design and it's so comfy. I like the length too, and I think this badboy would look awesome with any jeans and boots or a plain skirt. 

Vintage Boys T Shirt

I love this colour like, rusty orange is my shit. My mum got given this by a friend years ago and I used to wear it all the time, but I didn't think it would still fit me, and I hadn't seen it in years, but I think I can still rock it. 

Vintage Grunge Floral Dress

This also came from my mum. She had it listed on Etsy for ages but it never sold, and I thought it would look so freaking cool with some DM's and a hat. I like to leave it open at the bottom to get a lil sneaky sneaky sexy leg thing going on. 

Thanks for checking out my haul, I'll be sure to get my April Favorites up soon too.



Dealing with anxiety & panic attacks.

Anxiety Depression Film PhotographyMy own film photography. All rights reserved. 

Honesty time dudes. I have always been a worried person, I worry about everything; but recently I have developed anxiety, and begun having panic attacks.

I thought it may be helpful to some people to share my personal experiences and what my homeopathic doctor has told me.

How I deal with panic attacks

Personally, I have bad times and better times; once every couple of weeks I have a period of 2 or 3 days where I'm more sensitive and susceptible to attacks (although I'm generally anxious most of the time). They usually happen when I'm stressed about something I have to do, or when I'm in a small space (like the bus mostly, sometimes the car).
When I feel an attack coming on, I put my sunglasses on so it's less obvious (because if people notice it makes it worse for me) and I breathe deeply. I think it's linked to feeling like I don't have enough air, which would explain the small spaces. Whatever I do, I'm going to have a panic attack, so the best thing is to just ride it out and breathe in and out slowly, until I calm down. It's difficult for me when people want to help me, because I know how to deal with it in my own head, and other people paying attention to me just makes it worse. Luckily now my boyfriend understands this, and lets me deal with it.

Homeopathic Remedies

I went to see a homeopathic doctor, because I knew that if I started taking lots of different pills, I would get anxious about side effects and dosage and ugh, not a fun time.
He told me to do yoga, stop drinking coffee, and stop watching horror films. I'm pretty pissed about the last two, but I can get on board with yoga.

He also prescribed me 4 different remedies: Ignatia Amara for the mornings, Kalium Bromatum for the night, Natrum Muriaticum once a week, and a mix of Valeriana Officinalis, Argentum Nitricum, Phosphoric Acid and Spigelia Anthelmia for when I'm actually having an attack (which I haven't needed yet). He also gave me a big dose of Phosphorus to do once a month if the problem persists.

Ignatia Amara is from the St. Ignatius bean, and it's been used to treat anxiety, depression, insomnia and more.
Kalium Bromatum is Bromide of Potassium. Typically used for insomnia, night terrors, sleep paralysis etc.
Natrum Muriaticum is basically salt. It is used for many, many things, from acne to colds, headaches and digestive complaints.
Valeriana Officinalis or Valerian, is a flowering plant, which has been used to treat insomnia for centuries.
Argentum Nitricum or silver nitrate is a chemical compound. Often used for dizziness, sweating and other side effects of anxiety.
Phosphoric Acid is a mineral acid, used mostly to treat nausea.
Spigelia Anthelmia is a plant. It helps with problems related to the heart, but also migraines, dizziness, etc.

I think not watching horror films, although it annoys me, is a good idea. Subconsciously the shocking images could easily be a trigger. I would also advise drinking herbal tea, particularly chamomile, nothing with any caffeine.

I will report back once my month of using these remedies is over. I also have cut out caffeine and sugar, and since a while back all animal products of any kind.

Thanks for reading



Jessica Barensfeld & Simon Howell // Interior Design

I'm sorry to announce that I've been planning an outfit of the day post for ages, but I can't seem to get any fucking sunlight. It's been raining non stop. God Paris is so overrated I swear, the weather is as bad as England. 
Also when I woke up this morning, I was very sick. I think I ate too much pizza last night, but I was really not feeling it, so I went back to bed for a bit.

So I decided to share something I love instead of taking photos of myself (which I really don't wanna do right now). This interior, the house of Jessica Barensfeld & Simon Howell. These beautiful photos were taken for an interview on Freund von Freunden, so go check it out.

I just love all the bits and bobs, the organized chaos, the mix and match of old and new, it's really beautiful. It actually takes a lot of effort for your house to look shabby yet homely. 

I'm so sorry for the quick post, I promise to do an OOTD as soon as the sun shows it's fucking head. 

Thanks for reading x



Wednesday Wishlist // Cruelty free cosmetics, home goods & more.

Well, I don't want to sound big headed, but I am the number one best deal finder on the planet. If you want a thing, I can find the thing for cheap. Try me. I'll find the thing. So anyway, here is a lil list of some of the things I've been drooling over recently. All products shown here are vegan and cruelty free, so enjoy guilt free shopping.


LUSH "Damaged" - 9.95$ (20g)
Lush DAMAGED oil hair mask

My hair is so dry and frizzy right now, I don't know if it's the weather or just years of chemical dyes finally catching up to me. I'd really like a good smelling hair treatment, so I can make my hair all nice before annihilating it again. Hair dye forever.

Glossier Milky Jelly Cleanser - Currently out of stock (Will be restocked very soon).

I've seen so many beauty bloggers and vloggers talking about this cruelty free brand, and this cleanser looks so soft and classy. Like stilettos and champagne for your face. I've really only heard great things about it !

E.L.F Contour Palette - 8€ / 6$
E.L.F contour palette kit
I have wanted this for so long and it's finally back in stock ! But i'm also very poor this month ! Fuck everything ! 
No but e.l.f are bae. 


Urban Outfitters "Cooperative Scalloped Button-Front Mini Skirt" - 49$
Urban Outfitters vintage style button down skirt

Just look at it, it's fucking adorable. God dammit Urban, why you so expensive ?

Topshop "BEST lace up boots" - £39
Topshop low heel black boots

I would really like a pair of low heeled boots, cause I have heels that I never wear because I can't walk in them properly because I'm basically a man. I reckon these would be easy to walk in and comfortable, bonus points also because they're super frickin cute.

eBay Sheer Dotted Ankle Socks - £1.29
Cute cheap ankle socks

Cheap and adorable. I think these would look so good popping out of the top of my low DMs in the summer, paired with a midi skirt or something.


Vitacost  Organic Dark Chocolate Covered Almonds - 6.59$ (199g)
Organic Dark Chocolate Covered ALmonds Healthfood

Just because almonds x chocolate. Give me all the chocolate.

Balzacs Bolivian Roasted Organic Coffee Beans - 15$ (12 Oz)
Organic Roasted Coffee

I found this because of the packaging, it turned up on my pinterest, and since then I've been dying to buy a bag and crush me some fresh beans. Let me know if you've tried this brand, I'd love to know how good it tastes. I bet it's like sipping from gods private drinking pool.

Anthropologie Edible Beauty Tea - Green Goddess Detox - 26$ (3.5 Oz)
Anthropologie Green Detox Tea Organic

There are plenty of others teas on the same page, so flip through and find the one you like. I just thought green tea was a basic choice, and I couldn't go wrong. I love green tea, and it's so good for your immune system. I only drink it in the mornings or early afternoon though, because I suffer from insomnia so anything that could stop me sleeping is a big fat no.


eBay Mini Post It Notes - £0.99
Cheap Post It Sticky Notes Office & Desk Organization

ADORABLE ! CHEAP ! Life = complete. They send you a random color combination, but I mean all the colors are cute so whatevs.

eBay Marble Effect MacBook Sticker - £9.90
Marble Stone Effect Sticker MacBook Pro MacBook Air
I was just given a MacBook by my boyfriends sister (I know right, lucky bitch up in here), and he already has the same one, so I was looking at ways to make mine look cool, and make it easy to differentiate between the two. I thought this sticker was so fucking classy, and really affordable.

Bath & Body Works Black Teakwood Scented Candle - 12.50$
Black Teakwood Bath & Body Works Scented Candle
I don't know, it sounded like it smelt nice and I dig candles.

Modcloth Insect-or Gadget Travel Bottle - 29.99$

Vintage Sketch Insects Thermos Flask

How cool though ? How cool is this thermos ? I can feel myself filling this with Rooibos tea and hurling it in my handbag. I'm just so in love.